melancholy kind of mood

well, i've been missing my family a lot lately. it's not like i ever go through a phase where i don't miss them. it's just that some times it's more intense. i can't really pinpoint the intensification and i don't really know if i want to. but i've been thinking that i don't really like that i can move half a world away and their lives continue without me. now i know what i'm saying is incredibly selfish but i'm just being brutally honest right now. in my mind, i would rather everything be different without me there but it's not. life goes on. i don't know why i'm sharing this with the free world...i just wanted to express what's going on in my mind right now.

i'm going on almost one year since talking to my dad and that definitely stings. i have no way of reaching him and he hasn't attempted to call me. yeah, that stings for sure. and i don't like the ball being in his court because then he has the power to hurt me. but i guess he only has that power if i give it to him. things that make you go hmmmmm...

please pray that God would come into these areas and rain His spirit.

thank you.

wandering in my mind

Revelation 22:2b - AND THE LEAVES OF THE TREE ARE FOR THE HEALING OF THE NATIONS.

To put it simple, I want to be a healer of nations. Of course, knowing full well that Jesus is the absolute healer, I want to walk alongside Him and be used to heal nations. What does that mean? I know bits and pieces but to comprehend it fully, I think I might need to be in the hereafter. The leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations...Lord, I pray for more insight as to what that means. What does it look like? Where's my place in it? I can't stand to think that I would live a mediocre life only concerned with myself. I refuse to forget the things that are on your heart. I refuse to look away and pretend I don't see hurting people. I refuse to be satisfied with the status quo. I refuse to be satisified until I awake in Your likeness (Psalm ?). I want to be like Abraham who believed when you spoke to him and it was credited to him as righteousness. I want to be a healer. Simply put, I want you.

church by the river!

contemplative
Originally uploaded by reminisced content.

well, a few of us have the tradition of walking down to flinders (an outdoor market) on sundays, getting a coffee from dominion and then sitting by the river and talking about god. it's completely informal and i absolutely covet our random discussions. one day kendall rolled over in the grass and found six one dollar coins...

reflections!

cheese
Originally uploaded by reminisced content.

i love this shot! my friend, nikki, took it! that's my nose. by the way, not my sunglasses...i was borrowing them from stina...she's in the reflection.

my grandma is sweeter than chocolate!

cool chocolate bar art
Originally uploaded by I like fireflies.

well, i spoke with my grandma on the phone today and i definitely left the conversation with a smile. she always starts out saying that there's not much new going on...but then we talk for an hour and she definitely has a lot to say. oh, i love her! i miss the smell of her house, the tenderness of her hugs and the love in her eyes. she told me today that she was proud of me and that is something you never get tired of hearing. well, grandma, i'm proud to be called your granddaugher. thank you for your heritage of love! my cup truly runneth over...

and then there was sparky...

perfect
Originally uploaded by I like fireflies.

here's a future hall of famer...what hall of fame i do not know...but she'll be in one of them! or is that only for sports stars. oh, well! you get my point, right? i met sparky (aka jen sparks) on outreach in darwin. she was on staff up there and i thought she was pretty cool. she was the kind of staff that answered all my crazy questions and treated me like one of them. i was so excited when she came to townsville in january to help with iwt. our friendship grew to an unexplainable beautiful thing and now she's moved on too. that's the one thing about life that i don't necessarily like...not being close to loved ones. i wish i could see anyone that i wanted within a couple of minutes. kind of like a beam me up, scotty thing...or if i could just fly there.

have i ever told you that i dream of flying? and i'm not talking about getting on a plane...i'm talking about lifting my fist to the air and taking off. i think it's possible because planes fly and birds...so the possibility is out there...

farewell, jo!

farewell
Originally uploaded by I like fireflies.

it's one of those seasons where a lot of close friends are moving on. jo was here to do public relations for iwt, so at the beginning of september she look the long flight back to england. she sat next to me during the iwt season and it's lonely without her sitting next to me. i miss our conversations about random things and about god. she is a woman of wisdom and faith...and absolutely hilarious. i miss having tea with you, jo and just simply sharing our hearts! love you!

my friend nikki

what a smile!
Originally uploaded by I like fireflies.

i wanted to write a few blogs about friends that have moved on to different things. it's not that they've moved out of my life but i certainly won't be seeing them on a daily basis. take nikki for example...we became friends on our dts. we always have these amazing chats about god and life. they just flow and i always leave the converation with revelation of some kind. this woman has encouraged and loved me into the person i am today. during her last months at rto she became my roommate and i wouldn't have had it any other way. i probably wouldn't gone mental if she wasn't there living with me actually. she left at the beginning of august and i miss her presence every day. love you, mate! just wanted to give you a shout out!

Not a detail was missed...

my new pilsner
Originally uploaded by I like fireflies.

I'm telling you, there was not one detail missed at this wedding. When we arrived at the reception hall the entire wedding party had pilsners with their names engraved on them. I felt like a movie star!

Welcome, Mr. and Mrs. Brandt!

nice shot Momma!
Originally uploaded by I like fireflies.

Here's a picture of my best friend Laura and her husband Peter. What a wedding it was! I went to it last month but I've been a bit slack in blogging it. Anyway, the wedding was perfect in every way! Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. And, look at them, those are NOT fake smiles. It was such a joyous occasion. I loved how my Mom captured this moment with her camera.

To Laura and Peter - I pray that God will continue to melt your hearts together and that you will make Him the center of your life. May his spirit seep into every area of your marriage. Love you guys!

ridiculously random days

today is one of those delightfully random days. first off, i started off in the accounts office helping to plan intercession for tomorrow morning. then people came in for a surprise party for carol, who turned 21 today. someone had the brilliant idea of having a cheezel snorting contest...basically, to put a cheezel in your nose and see how far you can launch it. we were dragging anybody that walked by into the office to try this olympic event. it was great fun. and then i tried having a sword fight with a ceiling fan...but that's a whole other story.

make sure and laugh today...days are wasted without laughter...

waiting for a ride...

well, right now i'm sitting on a blue couch in an area of the warehouse we call the sweet spot.  it's the area where everyone hangs out, check's their email or plays a game.  my friend/roommate crissa and i are waiting for our roommate, who has a car, to give us a ride home.  we've probably could've been home by now but we are really at the point of commitment i say.  by that, i mean we can't really turn back on waiting for the ride now.  we are tired and if we started walking now, they would probably pass us on the road and we would've wished we'd waited longer.  did you catch all those w words i just used.  i should write a book about things that start with the letter w.  it could be a children's book.  we will wait a wittle wonger...he, he, he!